just another list.

Just to be annoying.

• A. Why my last relationship ended:
  I don't know if qualify it as a relationship, but I think I didn't like him enough, and neither did he, but I can only speak for myself, and I think I was just bored and he was cute.
• B. Favourite band:
  it's not like I could just pick one, but if I had to it would be Brand New ♥
• C. Who I like and why I like them:
  I can't say I like someone, liking is much much deeper than what I feel about anyone right now, or so I'd like to believe.
• D. Hardest thing I’ve ever been through:
  my mom and dad being together.
• E. My best friend:
  I don't know if I could call her my best friend, since I don't like the therm, but I think she's the closest one. She's the only person who has been able to reach to me this deep, I usually don't let people in.
• F. My favourite movie:
  I have a huge list, but if I had to pick just one it would be Forrest Gump, or Donnie Darko.
• G. Sexual orientation:
  I am sexually attracted to boys only, I guess that makes me straight.
• H. Do I smoke/drink?
  Not really, just when I'm out and try to feel different. I must admit I have been a bit lost lately, and letting myself loose has been my way out of it, not sure if it has helped in the sightless, tho.
• I. Have any tattoos or piercings?
  Yes, I have a red and blue swallow bird tattoo on the back of my neck, and a few ear piercings.
• J. What I want to be when I get older:
  I guess I am older, but not sure of exactly what I want to be.
• K. Relationship with my parents:
  they're both cool, my mom is very close to me, and yet we fight a lot.
• L. One of my insecurities:
  I don't feel like people like me, or that anyone ever could. From what I've learned, people always like somebody else better than me.
• M. Virgin or not?
  yes.
• N. Favourite place to shop at?
  Urban outfitters, forever XXI, mango, Zara....
• O. My eye colour:
  hazel.
• P. Why I hate school:
  I don't hate school, I just wish I could open much more to people, have more friends.
• Q. Relationship status as of right now:
  single as fuck.
• R. Favourite song at the moment:
  my ringtone: M83's Midnight City
• S. A random fact about myself:
  I hate animal figures at the bottom of pools.
• T. Age I get mistaken for:
  It used to be 17, now I'm not sure.
• U. Where I want to be right now:
  anywhere fun, maybe NYC I love that place.
• V. Last time I cried:
  a few moments ago, lately I've been crying a lot.
• W. Concerts I’ve been to:
  none important.
• X. What would you do if (…)?
  ?
• Y. Do you want to go to college:
  i already am.
• Z. How are you?
  alive.

I'm in  love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we’re all doomed and that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we’ll ever have, and I am in love with you.

- Augustus, “The Fault in our Stars” (John Green)

Here are the top five regrets of the dying, as witnessed by Bronnie Ware, an Australian nurse who spent several years working in palliative care:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

“This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.”

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

“Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

“This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to theirselves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.