Don't ever take a fence down until you know why it was put up.

-Robert Frost


I don't know how or why whenever I'm driving this inspiration hits me,
thoughts flash faster than my car's speed 
and come and go faster than green lights turns to red.

I'm only writting this because I'm a 100% sure that no one would ever read this, but me.
So today I hung out with my friend Pocket,
she's pretty cool; but she told me one thing that I've heard too many times before:
she told me I'm just too lucky I've never cared/loved anyone because that keeps me from getting hurt.
but it keeps me from feeling anything,
I guess I'm just too well fucked up,
I can't let myself feel anything for anyone
because I'm just too scare to get hurt;
I'm just...
I don't know what I am.

It's kinda scarry to know I'm turning 19 next month,
and I have never in my life kissed anyone,
held a hand with a boy that I like or done anything normal teenagers do.
I guess it never felt wrong to not like anyone,
but I guess it is starting to feel very wrong.




whatever,
jsut letting it out of my chest.