Day 23

→ Something you wish you had done in your life. 

I wish I had tried harder and got into a film school in other country, maybe Canda.

I wish I had the money and tried my best to find some kind of scholarship. 

Day 22

→ Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.

Closing myself to people, I've never given anyone the chance to get close to me or have any kind of relationship. I do regret that in some ways, I've missed out on a lot of things.

Day 21

→ (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do? 

 

I'd probably call her mom to see which hospital she's at, and I'd go see her.

I don't think there's a fight big enough to forget about your bf when she's in the hospital.

Day 20

→ Your views on drugs and alcohol. 

I personally don't do either of them, because they held no interest to me. I don't like how alcoholic beverage taste and people while being on drugs are stupid, I don't want to be neither of those. 

but I'm no one to tell people how to live their lives, so do as you please :)

Day 18 and 19

Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage. 

I think everyone has the right to be happy as long as their happiness doesn't interfere with anyone else's. I don't think gay marriage's interefere with anyone's happiness, I'm completely supportive of it.

 

Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics? 

I truthfully believe religion is the opium of the masses, in many ways.

I am suportive of spiritual beliefs, but religion holds back people from doing a lot of things and causes a lot of problems when taken literally. I'm not actually suportive of religion when mixed with politics, supports racism, sexism, wars, and many other things I'm against of.

Politics, are controled with people whose interest aren't in the right places, they just care about money and make things I'm not suportive at all. They manipulate people into voting for them so they can do whatever they want, they promise things they won't even try to accomplish. 

I belive society would be ten times better without any of this things, but I'm sure we would have to start all over again, from scratch :)

 

 

Day 17

→ A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.

Chuck Palahniuk just in general, I think his mind is awesome in a lot of way, he's changed my views in life, religion, love and a lot of other things. Just his perspective and the way he portrays his characters, it's just beautiful and lifechanging. 

Weaknesses?

I have a hard time expressing my emotions or admiting I have them, that sometimes holds me back from doing the things I want to or even the people. I take this part of me as a strenght and a weakness.

Ask me anything

Day 16

→ Someone or something you definitely could live without. 

there's a whole bunch of people who come to mind, haha and I don't mean that in a bad way, just because I am not a clingy person, I am real independent and I don't get that close to people most of the time. I think I could live without anyone. S: Doesn't mean that I'd like to, tho. 

 

Day 15

→ Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.

I don't think there's someone at the moment, but at some point there was this guy who I liked, was the first guy I actually liked. One day he decided that he didn't liked me anymore, and started to be real mean to me and all, and I tried to back away from him, and that was really hard. But I just got over him and now I don't even mind him :)

 

heroesofheartache.x

It’s like your heart has been ripped out and stomped on. You can’t breathe, you don’t want to eat, you can’t function. It’s the most intense pain that you’ll ever feel, and there’s no way to relieve it. Its unyielding, merciless torture, and you know it’s yours for life. 

 -Dawson’s Creek

February 3, 2010

mention love and suddenly everything starts thinking, really thinking, about who they are, what they are, and how they are, it's like love is a force that defines us, constructs the sinsides of our bodies, it is the bones and music and tissue and maybe love isn't an emotion, or a product of the media or a chemical in our bodies, but an animal instinct, a motivation, and I don't mean love as in wanting someone, because we need everyone and everything, we cannot choose what we need, but with want, we have a choice. Love is the tug on your insides that tugs every animals insides. The drive, the motivation, the want, the want, the want.

To just be close to someone, to wrap yourself up in their thoughts and words and mistakes and fall asleep

I've been asking everyone what it means, because I've been avoiding asking myself but it just is, with or without my analyzing and poking and pordding, it is, even if no one ever defined it, it would still be. It is eternal, and it changes and evolves and grows and dies, it is an animal within itself, burrowing inside of us.

Tuck it in, fall asleep.

-Alexiamfree.

I wonder what you look like under your t-shirt. I wonder what you sound like when you’re not wearing words. I wonder what we have when we’re not pretending. 

-Ani Difranco.

the notebook

Dreams are always crushing when they don’t come true. But it’s the simple dreams that are often the most painful because they seem so personal, so reasonable, and so attainable. You’re always close enough to touch, but never close enough to hold and it’s enough to break your heart. 

An other night with her when I'm always wanting you

Cherish your solitude. Take trains by yourself to places you have never been. Sleep alone under the stars. Learn how to drive a stick shift. Go so far away that you stop being afraid of not coming back. Say no whever you don't want to do something. Say yes if your instincts are strong, even if everyone around you disagrees. Decide whether you want to be liked or admired. Decide if fitting in is more important than fiding out what you're doing here. Believe in kissing.

-Eve Ensler

Day 14

→ A hero that has let you down.

Spiderman, when he failed to save New York City on 9/11.

Just kidding (:

I don't think I have a hero, I think that expecting things from people only lead to disapoinment.

I just don't have expectations on other people, and naming someone your hero it's expecting something BIG out of that person.

 

him.

follow the white rabbit.x

I need you to listen for just a second. I don't care if you only shop at thrift stored. And I don't care if you read nothing but classic novels. It is not important to me whether you are thirteen or thirty four, foreign or native, thin or overweight. I will not judge you. It does not matter to me what kind of haircut you have, what sort of statement you're making while you lead a vegan lifestyle or if you love steaks and fried eggs. Love sex, hate drugs, do cocaine, listen to Simon and Garfunkel. I'm not interest in how superior your taste in underground music is. I couldn't care less if you're wearing urban outfitters jeans, thrifted shoes, or a Hollister polo. It is not important to me whether you are a writer, a dreamer, a painter, a gas station, clerk, or if you're living off food stamps. I don't give a shit if you're a hippie, a half-assed hipster, an atheist, a devoted Christian, wealthy, dirty, catholic, homeless, jewish, Buddhist, a smoker, a drinker, clean or shy, I will not judge you. It doesn't matter to me how extensive your vocabulary may be, which independent films you've seen, what books you've read, how high your IQ is. I will still open the door for you. I promise. And I will let you sit near me if another seat is unavailable. Even if I disagree with some of your ideas. I will fucking respect you. I will offer you some common decency. And not because it's right, and not because you deserve it, but because that is what makes sense to me. This is what has always made sense to me. i'm a shadow. Neurotic, opaque, and drunk with fascination. I'm your friend. And you don't have to impress me. Because I'm not here to impress you.

-Anonymous.

You might be my last chance at a good thing.

-Back Seat Goodbye

"Listen, I'm getting too old for a lot of things, but I'm not too old for words. For a baggy pair or jeans and my boyfriend's t shirts. I'm not too old for wine in a paper cup and a mrlboro everyone once in a while. I'm not too old for Peter pan and I'm not too old to quote Holden Caulfield. I'm not too old to lay in my bed all day trying to get this story out of my skin, trying to burn it through the paper and leave my thumb prints hanging from each corner. I'm not too old to stare at the glow in the dark stars stuck to my ceiling at night. I'm not too old to ride around with the windows down and Simon and Garfunkel turned up, because that's the way Simon and Garfunkel should be played. I'm not too old to jump on my bed and refuse to wash my hair. I'm not too old to run around bare foot with a smile stuck on my face even when times are hard. And I'm not too old to get out of here. Next spring I'm taking off. to hear summer turn into fall. To listen as the leaves in a park somwhere whisper stories in my ear, to fall asleep in the rose gardens, wake up when winter laughs under my sheet. To write letter back home on paper napkins, make lightwaves feel like experiences. To make mistakes, to write poetry in the backest seat of a bus, to exchange a thousand awkward words with people I've never met, to do things I have never done on my own before, to fail miserable time over time, to fuck up and never ever ever ever give up."

-Anonymous.

Day 13

→ A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days.

 

Aww, I loved this one.

But I'll have to name more than just one band and take you back to when I was 9 years old.

Whenever I was down or my parrents where arguing I listened to Blink 182 or Papa Roach, their lyrics and fast beats actually made me feel better, or less alone.

Then, as I grew older (just a bit) taking back sunday and brand new where the bands I listened to whenever I was feeling sad or anything, my teenage years wouldn't have been bearable if this bands hadn't been in my life.

Currently Brand New is the only band who I still listen to religiously, their lyrics are extremelly powerful and very clever written. 

They have taken me through broken hearts, fights, sadness, even in the happy times.

I am seriously inlove with them, and I have no dobut that someday at least one of those lyrics it's going to be inked in my skin 'cause they already are in my heart.x

 

 

cent soixante et un

What is the one thing you would go back into the past and change?
I don't think I would change anything if I could, I like things the way they are and I don't know who I'd be if anything was different, don't know if I'd like the person I'd be if anything changed.

What is the thing you look forward to most in your life?Being completely self sufficient and happy.

How was your childhood?I think it was a normal childhood, not always happy but okay

How were your teenage years?
They were rough, but who’s weren’t? I wasn't feeling comfortable in my skin and went though that face in which you confront everything, and lacked confidence in everyone and everything, I liked boys and they broke my heart, and I got over it. It was fun, I guess. I'm still nineteen tho.

How were your adult years?
I'm not twenty yet, so I'm not sure if I could considere myself and adult yet. don't do anything adult-like yet.

What are you taking in school?
I’m currently working on getting my degree in comunication studies so I can get an scholarship and study film school in Canada :)

What is the one thing you’ve always been good at?
Debates, I'm good at debating people :)

What are your strengths and weaknesses?I think weakness are easier to notice, so I'll start there, I tend to back away from emotional envolment, so I never get close to people. I'm shy and have hard time letting people in. I trust so little people, I'm selfish, I'm stuborn, I have a hard time apologizing or admiting I'm wrong. I don't tell people how I feel and I save a lot of myself to myself.

I think on my strenghts I can count on having a voice and speaking my mind, not matter who might not like it. I am very creative and artsty in all senses of the word. I like reading and watching movies, and since film is my passion I think I'm good at writting scripts and all :)

What is the thing that confuses you the most?
People in general, their decitions and how what they say isn't always how they feel.

What do you plan on doing in the next couple of months?
Starting another school year. Hopefully meeting new people.

Do you have a girlfriend/boyfriend?

Nope, would be nice, tho.

How long have you been in a relationship with them?
N/A

What is your favourite thing to do with your girlfriend/boyfriend?
N/A

Do you have any pets?
A bunnie rabbit named Donnie after Donnie Darko.

Are you happy?
I could be happier.

What makes you happy?
Hanging out with friends, books, cultural activities, traveling, clothes, people, movies, etc, etc.

What makes you sad?
The same things that make other people sad.

What makes you angry?
People, lol

Are you happy with the way you look?
not always

Would you change the way you look for someone you love?
No, I’d only change the way I look for me.

Have you been in love more than once?
Nope, I don't think so. I have a real hard time letting people in, so even admiting I like someone is real hard for me. I don't think I've evern been in love or loved someone in a romantic way.

Do you trust people easily?
Not at all.

Would you trust your best friend with your life?
I wouldn’t trust anyone with my life, maybe just my mom.

Have you ever regretted something?
Some things, but maybe not regret, because I don't believe in regretting things you once wanted.

Has something ever happened to you that changed your life completely?
The one constant in life is change, so of course.

Do you want to get married?
Not necessarily, but if I absolutely find the right person I would be open to the idea.

Do you want to have children?
I've thought about it.

How close are you with your family?
I’m super close with my mom, and I do have a good relationship with the rest of my family.

Do you hate anyone?
Nope, such a waste of energy and time.

What country do you live in?
Guatemala

Do you want to live in a different country?
yeah, but just for a while.

Have you ever been to a different country before?
yes, several states in the USA, El Salvador and México.

Do you plan on traveling with your life?
I'd love to :D

cientosesenta

Where were you THREE hours ago?
I was sleeping :)

Are you wearing SOCKS right now?
nope, I'm wearing my white keds socksless, HA!

When was the last time you went out of STATE?
Um, I don't remember.

Have you been to the M0VIES in the last 5 days?
nope, but I'm going later :)

What did you see?
I'm going to watch Shrek 4 3D

What was the last thing you had to drink?
water :)

What are you wearing right now?
my new light blue jeans and my favorite grey stripped tshirt

What was your last purchase?
hum, clothes

If you could be anywhere where would you be?
any place any human has never been to

Are you on the phone?
nah

Have you bought any clothing items in the last week?
yes i did :D

Do you have a pet?
yes! a bunny rabbit named donnie who I love deeply

Whats your mood right now?
good, my hip hurts tho.

What did you do last night?
I was online

What is the last thing you purchased online?
Go Ask Alice book

What’s your favorite soup?
alphabet soup, love playing with the letters

You miss anyone?
not really

Last movie you saw?
hum, The Runaways, liked it so much.

What are your plans for the day?
going to the movies with this college friends

Did you have fun today?
not yet, my head aches and I'm sleepy

Who is your last text message from?
Carol

Were you an honor roll student in school ?
My school didn't have that kind of things

It's pointless

What do you know about the future?
i don’t know about the future.

The last person you rode in a car with?
my mom, I guess

Do you have a tan?
nope, pale as fuck

How old do you want to be when you have kids?
I don't know, not thinking about it yet

Did you meet anyone new today?
nope

Do you have any tattoos or piercings?
yes! a swallow bird tattoo on the back of my neck; and my ear lobes pierced plus two others on my left ear.

How do you like your soda?
cold

Like hot sauces?
nope, not at all

What are you doing tomorrow?
suposedly going to LA tomorrow, not sure

What day is tomorrow?
thursday

What is your current mood?
i said good earlier, but I'm rather bored

Who was the last person to call you hun?
no one, that's gay

Why?
because, it's gay!

Do you remember the first person you ever kissed?
n/a

Do you have a crush on anyone right now?
nah, all boys are fags, lol

If you could be on a TV show, which one would it be?
hum, gossip girl, seems fun and there are a lot of hot guys there :)

Have you ever watched a movie and just “had” to do what they did?
haha yeaaahh, I planed doing the yes man thing! lol

Do you have a “face” you make in the mirror?
yes, haha

Ever use someone else’s toothbrush?
nope eww

Do you like/love the person you got this survey from?
I don't know her

Can you whistle?
sort of

Is there a song that comes on that you just “have” to turn up and sing to?
haha, yeah

currently is new found glory's cover of lovefool

Who are you thinking about right now?
no one.

Go now, and live.

Experience. Dream. Risk. Close your eyes and jump. Enjoy the freefall. Choose exhilaration over comfort. Choose magic over predictability. Choose potential over safety. Wake up to the magic of the everyday life. Make friends with your intuition. Trust your gut. Discover the beauty of uncertainty. Know yourself fully before you make promises to another. Make millions of mistakes so that you will know how to choose what you really need. Know when to hold on and when to let go. Love hard and often and without reservation. Seek knowledge. Open yourself to possibility. Keep your heart open, your head high and your spirit free. Embrace your darkness along with your light. Be wrong every once in a while, and don't be afraid to admit it. Awaken to the brilliance in ordinary moments. Tell the truth about yourself no matter what the cost. Own your reality without apology. See godness in the world. Be bold. Be fierce. Be grateful. Be wild, crazy and gloriously free. Be you.

Go now, and live.

 

Day 12

→ Something you never get compliments on. 

My attitude, haha

Yeah, I can be a real bitch at times, and I have a real hard time forgiving people and asking for forgiveness, I never apologize, well, almost never.

And my attitude, it's because I tend to react in a real defensive way when I feel confronted. :S

 

Day 11

→ Something people seem to compliment you the most on. 

Where I'm from it's really difficult to accept different things and being this way is mostly punished for being asociated with gangs, and when I say different I mean, having a weird hair color, dressing in a non-preppy way or having piercings or tattoos. I live in a really conservative society, and it's been real hard for me to be able to dress and do the things I want and to be accepted at the same time.

And I've been complimented mostly on being myself beside all that adversity, I guess.

The creativeness it takes, and the smarts I've gotten from reading books and all that. :)

 

Day 10

→ Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know. 

I don't think anyone there, I might need to let go of certain ideas I had about what I wish could happen with this certain someone, but I don't wish I didn't know him or anything like that. Just wish I didn't feel the way I do about him.

 

hell.x

Even if you think the flame has died, there’s at least one lyric that’ll hit that last hot spot, and then you’ll find yourself as fucked as you were the day you lied and said you never wanted to see her again

— John Mayer

#abclayers

LAYER 1: ON THE OUTSIDE.
Name: Viacely Sánchez

Birth Date: October 27th, 1990

Current Location: My bedroom, Guatemala City, Guatemala

Hair Color: it’s died, but my hair is light brown

Righty/Lefty: right

LAYER 2: ON THE INSIDE.
Your fear: being alone, roaches

Your dream of the perfect date: I don’t think about stuff like that.

LAYER 3: YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW.
Your thoughts first waking up:What time is it?

Your best physical feature: I'm not sure, you tell me

Your bed time: right now, I'm in a semester brake, so I fall asleep around 1am

Your most missed memory: being seven and yeah.

LAYER 4: YOUR PICK.
Pepsi or Coke: coke <3

McDonald’s or Burger King: Mc 'cause of the fries.
Single or Group Dates: just hanging out
Adidas or Nike: both good

Chocolate or Vanilla: vanilla

Cappuccino or Coffee: frappuccino

LAYER 5: DO YOU.
Smoke: no
Cuss: no
Take showers: daily

Have a crush: not sure

Like school:very much, yeah

Believe in yourself: sure

Believe what goes around comes around: as a consequence, yeah. As something from a bigger force, no.

Believe everything happens for a reason:nope. Everything that happens are just consequences, not faith.

Think you’re a health freak: obviously not

LAYER 6: IN THE PAST MONTH.
Gone to the mall: last weekend

Been on stage: nope

Eaten sushi: nope, take me?

Been hurt: sure
Dyed your hair: not this month.

LAYER 7: HAVE YOU EVER.
Played a stripping game: nope!

Kissed the same sex: no
Got beaten up: not really
Changed who you were to fit in: not really

LAYER 8: GETTING OLD.
Age you’re hoping to be married by: not sure about marriage, but I'd like to have some sort of companionship for the rest of my life

Number of kids you’re planning on having: depends, probably two

LAYER 9: IN A GIRL/GUY.
Best eye color: light colors, hazel/green/blue

Hair color: dark

Short or long hair: longish

Fat or fit:  um, yeah

Looks or personality: both

Fun or serious: fun
LAYER 10: WHAT WERE YOU DOING.
1 MINUTE AGO: doing this while watching the simpsons

1 HOUR AGO: eating

1 WEEK AGO: out

1 YEAR AGO: how would I know?

LAYER 11: FINISH THE SENTENCE.
I feel: lonely

I hate: feeling like this

I hide: my feelings/emotions

I need: to do something else

I love: my tumblr

LAYER 12: FAVORITES.
Band: couldn't just pick one, maybe Brand New

Color:grey

Food:Chinese

Thing to do: I change my mind too much to have favorite stuff.

LAYER 13: RANDOM.
How long have you known your best friend?: Iguess for 4 years or so

When’s the last time you kissed someone?: never

What’s your middle name?:don't have one, my brother told me when I was 5 it was Ramona

What are you excited for?: LA this thursday!

Do you have any saved texts on your phone?: yeah (:

What’s something random about you?: I want to learn french, I love the language

xx

9 lasts
1. Cigarette: never. i have actually never put a cigarrete in my mouth.
2. Beverage: orange tea
3. Kiss: never, again
4. Hug: earlier
5. Movie seen: Eclipse on the theatre, and Adventureland on tv
6. CD played: xx by the xx (:
7. Song listened to: you chase money for love by trouble andrew

8 have you evers1. Dated one of your best friends: sort of
2. Skinny dipped: no
3. Kissed somebody and regretted it: nope

4. Fallen in love: nope :(
5. Lost someone you loved: Yes
7. Been drunk and threw up: nope, never been drunk either.
8. Kissed in a vehicle: nope

7 states you’ve been to
Massachussets, New Hampshire, Florida, California, and nothing else, lol.

6 things you’ve done this week1. Got inked
2. Hung out with my high school friends :)

3. Had KFC and watched movies with a friend
4. Had breakfast with the homies

5. Watched Eclipse

6. brethed?
5 favourite things in no order
1. books
2. new iTunes

3. my iPod <3

4. my white keds!

5.hot boys :)

4 people you last talked to
1. mike
2. gina
3. kitty
4. marlen

3 wishes1. to have someone to love and loves me back (in a romantic way)

2. for school to start again, yes I'm bored. And for you to be in my class

3.for money to buy new clothes <3

2 things you want to be when you grow up1. cinematographer, or at least to write a script.
2.writter, maybe

1 thing you regret
1.Nothing yet, I believe you can't regret something you wanted once.

Pokemon!

1. Who is your favourite Pokemon?
Charmander.

2. Why is it your favourite?
'cause he's a fire-breathing dinasour, for God's sake, if that is not cool, I don't know what is.

and he seemed so sweet and faithful, and I love him :)

3. What is your favourite type of Pokemon? Why?
Fire.

4. If you were a Pokemon, what would you be?

Hum, I'd love to be Arcanine or some kind of Eve evolution.

5. What starter Pokemon would you choose? (name one for each region)
Kanto: Charmander
Johto: Cyndaquil
Hoenn: no idea, didn't see the show this far

Sinnoh: ^

New region (Isshu): ^

6. What would be the first Pokemon you catch on your journey?

Kanto: Pidgey
Johto: hum, maybe nidoran or something

Hoenn: 

Sinnoh:

7. Name your dream team. (any region)

I’ve never thought about a dream team, so I’ll just put my teams up. :o

Kanto: Charmander (or evolution), Arcanine, Golduck, Ivysor, Dragonite.

Johto: 

Hoenn: 

Sinnoh:

8. How long have you been interested in Pokemon?
Since I was like 9 and I first saw the show on tv :)

9. Do your friends and family like Pokemon?
yeah, me and my brother used to watch the show and all.

10. What are their favourites?
Idk.

11. What do you value more, the games or the toys?

Games are waaaaay cooler.

12. What games do/did you have?
Red, Blue, Golden.

13. What is your favourite plush? Figure? Game?
plush - Pikachu.
Figure- Charmander, both stuff animal and plastic toy.

game-Golden, the none with Ho-Ho.

14. Name your top 5 favourite Pokemon.
Charmander, Acanine, Moltres, Mew Two, and Dragonite

15. Name your top 5 least favourite Pokemon.

Zubats, Cacoon, caterpie and all it's evolutions.

16. Which is your favourite region?
Kanto, 'cause it was the original one.

Day 09

→ Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

I think there a more than just one person who drifted from me, I just gratuated from high school, which means I just drifted from over 100 people to who I liked, or thought they were nice at the least.

A lot of my friends went to different schools, and grew to be complete different people. We just grew out of everything we were and everything that made us friends.

I'm holding on to a fairytale.

Kissed somebody whose name starts with a C T J R or S?

nope.

Will you have a boyfriend/girlfriend in 6 months?

I'd like to.

Do you ever think about the past?

Yeah, I have to.

Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?

Gina called a few hours ago.

You ever kissed someone at your house?

nope.

When was the last time you saw your father?

Like 10 minutes ago.

Do you sleep with your door open or closed?

Closed, not locked tho.

Are you wearing shoes right now?

Nope, just socks.

Were you born in the 90’s?

 1990, babe ;)

Does your dad smoke?

Not that I know.

Do you hate it when people try to play with your hair?

No, I actually like it (:

How long is it until your birthday?

Um, 3 months, 10 days.

Would you ever lick a rat for $1,000?

Probably.

One thing you and your best friends always do when you hang out?

Talk shit.

Do you need to know everything about someone’s past?

No. If they don’t want to share something then that’s their business.

 

Would you prefer if good things happened, or interesting things?

Interesting are always good. But if they were good and interesting, would be lovely.

Do you own a picture phone?

Yes.

If your best friend came up to you and said “Hi” and then grabbed your boob?

I would probably back away.

Have you ever gone out of your way to make someone happy?

Yeah,sort of.

Was it a boy or a girl to text you first today?

Girl.

Have any memories that you’d like to forget?

Yes, but I'm not sure if I want to.

Have you ever kissed under water?

Nope, sounds nice, tho.

Is there a boy/girl that you would do absolutely everything for?

Naah, not sure about the absolutely everything part, but I'd do a lot for.

Day 08

→ Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.

I don't think anyone's ever made my life hell or treated me like shit, but I have a few stories in which I haven't felt loved  or treated the right way.

Well for starts, my dad. He's always been sort of sexist, in the way he treats my brother in comparison to how he treats me. I sometimes have felt like he loves him a bit more, which affected a lot of my behaviors when I was younger. I felt like I should match up to my brother, and I wasn't very girlie, I have always been a tomboy.

Then my brother, to whom my mother has made his life way easier than anyone's should. He's used to everyone doing everything for him and whenever he makes a mistake you are the one who has to apologize to him. Which has made my life harder, because everything sorrounds him and every action he does.

Then is one of my friends, or well, ex-friends, who made my life a bit harder, when we had a fight in 9th grade or something like that. We had one of those teenage fights that should be fixed with just a couple of weeks, but she got into her head that I had hacked her hi5 account (lol) and her mother started calling me all the time and making threats to me and my family, she even went to my school and made a complain, which my school dismissed due to lack of evidence, but anyway. She was always talking shit about what I had done, and made being arround some friends difficult. But then, she found out who had hacked her account, and she never apologized to me or said anything.